why I revert to a night light

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slice button this marchWhen Dave is in Ecuador,

I try to remember my cell phone more often,

I  obsessively double lock the front door,

the back door,

the laundry room door,

and my bedroom door.

I leave the light on in  the hall compulsively.

It glimmers and peeps under

the crack, of the door.

She’s wondering, I’m sure

why she must burn brightly

all the very long nights.

The paper sits under

the cell phone to access in an emergency

if my fingers can’t find…

Contacts quick enough,

Morning light gloriously arrives,

I drink only coffee

thinking that

this is the perfect opportunity to

fast…to lose weight.

I give up on that idea and

open the fridge, my friend,

rationalizing that food will

make me feel safe, happy,

loved

until Dave

returns home.

PS Today marks the half way mark of this vacation.  I want him to happily enjoy his vacation seeing Sammie, Em and John, but there is this irrational side of my brain that tells me that I feel scared and lonely too.  This will be the last time that we won’t be traveling together.  Here’s a picture of Dave and Sammie in 70 degree temperatures.  He is helping Em create a new garden in their backyard in the mountains outside of Quito.

PSS It is hard to deny our little Sammie her papa.

It looks like a cool garden already...but they are pretty weeds!

It looks like a cool garden already…but they are pretty weeds!

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About Judson RISE professor

lifelong teacher who is semi-retired (does this sound better?) who loves God, family and laughing... who hates social injustice... who wants to write every day... who needs to exercise every day... who blog hops... who wants to live her everyday life led by her savior, Jesus Christ!

12 responses »

  1. What’s weeds to one may be flowers to someone else. Feeling scared and alone is not irrational, it’s human nature. Love your poem. I also have a friend in my kitchen that I visit often.

  2. I always look forward to the time when hubby leaves for a couple of days – Oh, to be on my own, do what I want, when I want. I have good intentions of trying to lose weight, but my comfort foods call me. And, as the night comes to his first day away, I lock the doors, check them twice, don’t sleep very well and look forward to his return. Sammie is just way too adorable.

  3. I enjoy the time when my husband is away until night falls. You have captured these feelings and emotions well. Good luck with the remaining half! Keep double locking those doors, keeping those lights on and eating!

  4. I love that you personified the night light and that she “glimmers and peaks/under the crack of the door.” As I’ve gotten older, I don’t mind being alone in the house at night, but I am a bit more obsessive about the locks. Sammie is adorable!

  5. Sorry that you feel left behind, and don’t like the night, yet it seems as if you’ve solved the problem with all your precautions, Nancy. I loved that pic of Sammie-how darling. I’d retire too! And get thee to Equador! Have a great rest of the weekend yourself!

  6. I love this Slice so much!! So perfectly written!! You captured the tone and feeling so well with so few words!

    I wish I was your neighbor, I’d come over for coffee and a chat to keep you company!
    You’re halfway there…

  7. This is a great slice. I’m often too intimidated to try to communicate my thoughts in a poetic form, but you do it so beautifully. I could relate to so much of it and couldn’t contain the smile that spread across my face as I read your poem and realized that it described so many of the thoughts I have had in the past. My husband, sitting across the room, just asked me, “What are you reading? Fro the look on your face, it must be something interesting…” :He was right! 🙂

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